deSolaTe DeLighT

Another exploration of Gift Economy

2011-06-30T12:00:00.000-07:00

http://showmanshaman.wordpress.com/

Check out another version of Gift Economy exploration with lots of Lewis Hyde quotes. And the blog is by my son Ben Lloyd who's created a theater and arts residency program at this old magnificent mansion near Elkins Park PA.

Meditation and Ego gossip

2011-06-29T09:21:00.000-07:00

EXPOSING THE GOSSIP OF EGO ~ Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche

The basic practice of meditation is related with exposing the subconscious gossip of ego as well as exposing the conscious maneuvers of ego. Other schools of thought might say the practice of meditation is about trying to get higher, gain more, or stuff all kinds of things into your mind. In other words, these approaches are concerned with numerous techniques. But here, the idea of meditation is not designed to be collecting or producing more, but it is letting go.

what is meditation practice in dance.art.lab?

2011-06-28T10:12:00.001-07:00

what are we doing when we meditate?
is it important that we do the same thing?
what does it bring to us to train the mind through shamatha-vipashyana meditation techniques?
how much instruction is helpful?
when do we ask questions about the process and experiences of mind-training?
do some folks want to be left alone with their practice and others to receive more instruction?
how is your posture?
what do you do with big thought patterns that return again and again?
who is resting awake and relaxed?
who uses the eye practices/ear practices during sitting meditation sessions?
is anyone reading this?

evolution of DAL

2011-06-27T11:44:00.000-07:00

What is organic?

How does BD want to participate, what does she need?

what’s the ethos/culture?

what’s the intention?

what’s the organizing principle?

SUPPORT IDEAS:

Submit what you’d be comfortable leading/holding space for, then be invited by Barbara to lead something. Also, don't mind volunteering for tasks

Zen practice models, seniors/students for taking care of administrative and timekeeping business. co-facilitators lead - holding the space of wisdom (wearing the space suit of wisdom & breaking down "little jobs" in style of martial arts/zen retreat)

EVOLUTION IDEAS:

How do we deepen/advance of dal?

people deepen practice perhaps with sitting, writing, etc? for the month before coming

silent lunch?

If incorporating/expanding to 24:

break out rooms in the afternoon and late morning model

WHAT'S NECESSARY?:

what’s the intention of DAL?

To:

continue BD's lineage & gathering of the tribe

laboratory & news from the front

retreat/renew/reflect

day three is the hard day: Barbara to lead the morning is important

Elements of a dal/some things are always there:

contemplative dance practice in mornings

solo quads & parallel corridors

afternoon - everybody brings in scores scores – laboratory

group conversation – on a relevant philosophical question

evening potluck at Barbara’s - celebration

what’s on Barbara’s mind (like "follow me" this year)

themes of investigation from Barbara like notecards

gift economy conversation

call to have participants keeping conversation going thru blog, response

CDP/NYC reflections from 8/16

2010-08-24T16:59:00.001-07:00

CDP/NYC reflections from 8/16 (last date of summer session):

Myself, Carolyn, Taavo, Deb, Jeremy and Jessica:

We continued in the format of "flow" from sanctuary, sitting and personal awareness.

Warming up around perception: Jeremy quotes from CTR: "three levels/types of perception:

emptiness (recognizing space)

experience (noticing what's actually there and interacting with it)

luminosity (clarity to ?)

Taavo notes: In the search as actor for kinesthetic delight the support of gravity, weight & momentum act as support (great to have something fundamental occur as an "insight!)

* How does kinesthetic delight find support in character, story and image?

We continued the evolution of "the Solo Quads Aunt" with sound and light!

* How is the witnesser not part of a duet if they are holding a light

* How do we negotiate simultaneous music choice?

* Where is the line between influence/support/collaboration?

* How do we deal with questions around discretion, light as support, sound as support, witnesser as support (an exploration of all the elements via red square?)

The suggestion was made for each of us to contribute to a bag of support objects (lights, props) that may remain in the space/in circulation. evolving our recycled vocabulary.

Reflections from 8/9

2010-08-16T13:59:00.002-07:00

FROM LAST SESSION 8/9

Jessica, Carolyn, Taavo, Deb, Teana, Benj and Damaris.

We tried a "seamless flow" from PAP to Open Space (one hour of open space!) Very delicious. General consensus of much more sustained kinesthetic delight. We finished up with a "five minute recall aunt" (rough changing brain works from lengthy open space to tracking...).

FOR 8/16

Our last session for the summer/721 Broadway!

We will repeat last weeks format of "seamless flow" from PAP to (45 minutes of) Open Space.

I would like to continue with the solo quad evolution, incorporating the call for witnesser to have the option of selecting music, AND having the witnesser have the option of a lighting instrument.

After practice we are going to Veselka, and there we can pick our next "evolution meeting" date.

We begin our fall session monday september 20th at Bill Young Studios 100 Grand, and continue for twelve consecutive mondays.

CDP/NYC refelctions from 8/2

2010-08-16T13:59:00.001-07:00

FROM LAST SESSION 8/2

We discussed a quote of CTR's from Training the Mind & Cultivating Loving Kindness:

"When neurosis arises, you first have to recognize it as neurosis. Then you have to apply a technique or antidote to overcome it. Since neurosis basically comes fro selfishness, from placing too much importance on yourself, the antidote is that you have to cut through the ego. Finally, you have to have the determination not to follow the neurosis or continue to be attracted to it.There is a sense of abruptly overcoming neurosis."

We took a long sanctuary and sat, we then went into PAP and then played in open space.

CDP/NYC reflections from 7/26

2010-08-16T13:58:00.001-07:00

Hello,

FROM LAST SESSION 7/26

We finally read and discussed the dharma art letter - thanks Taavo! (let me know anyone if you want a copy, I can make some).

Words/questions/ideas that came up:

aggression, neurosis, benefit, insecurity/overconfidence/the healthy ego, any situation being workable, intention to ourselves and to others, gift, cutting through spiritual materialism, in conversation, humble.

So pithy and short that it's somehow threatening (genuine art?). Or, a call to action - examine what you do/mindful. Can we bridge the gap ever between audience and creator?

Last session we discussed the DAL after PAP, and then started a new PAP directly into open space.

although kinesthetic delight was strong at beginning, it seemed there was very little play between folks, compositionally more of a quality of holding something lightly, like red square; what would support a deep connection to kinesthetic delight AND a strong compositional eye in open space?

what would it be like to go from PAP into open space without any in between event (not our discussion of the DAL)?

how do we define entrances and exits?

what would it be like to actually answer "yes" to the self question "I can't really do this for the whole time, can I?"

We also did a solo quad aunt that built from last week with witnessers and added the option for each soloist to use their own music in one of the two speaker systems. Any two quads could be occupied simultaneously.

How much influence do you take from your soundscape?

How do we negotiate feeling the other soloists energy and awareness of their choice/volume in music?

What would it be like to have your witnesser chose your music for you?

What would it be like to do this practice wit hall these layers for a couple of hours?

FOR 8/1

Sara, Jeremy, Teana and Taavo will not be with us next week, We will be small but mighty!

I would like to share a very short reading that is in the same vein as the dharma art letter, and is also from CTR.

I would like to continue with the solo quad evolution, incorporating the call for witnesser to have the option of selecting music, AND having the witnesser have the option of a lighting instrument, but if there are only four of us, it may have to wait...

Are there any other calls?

xoxo

CDP/NYC reflections from 7/19

2010-08-16T13:57:00.000-07:00

Hello!

FROM LAST SESSION 7/19

we were joined by drop-ins Caitlin and Steve.

some categories of qualities of text:

judgement/observation, stream of consciousness/deliberate or intentional, poetic abstract/logic or compositional commenting/non commenting

we worked last night on an aunt with the constraint of when choosing to speak, noting whether you are following a judgement or observation and then staying with that one "thought" 'till it's done:

does directness in speech (non-self-consious) allows the audience to relax and absorb?

does use of props act as an entry into conversation with other improvers (a way to break through the "membrane"?

does bowing in/out of open space support clear endings of moments? what would bowing out in open space the moment you noticed you were "out" support?

is there a relationship between hight of audience eye gaze preference and village view? proscenium? what view supports which eye practices inside and outside?

we also did some solo quad practice with witnessers:

with solo quads which eye practices allow the quad witnesser the most support in viewing?

Carolyn, Benj and Sara had some aunt ideas for evolutions of solo quads relating to the role of the witnesser and moving the solos through open space.

We note that outside audience watching solo quads layers a lot of story on.

FOR 7/26

Sara, Jeremy, Teana will not be with us next week, but we should be joined by Benj (and rejoined by Jessica).

Meet again by guard desk by 5 'till so we can get changed and in space at 6p.

I have made a call to continue evolution of my solo quads aunt. PLEASE BRING A PIECE OF MUSIC YOU WOULD LIKE TO SOLO WITH EITHER ON AN IPOD OR IPHONE. (Maybe Carolyn, you might bring your radio/cd player?)

I suspect we will have another text/corridors aunt...

For reals we will also look at the dharma art letter, so bring that too if you have it.

CDP/NYC reflections from 7/11

2010-08-16T13:54:00.000-07:00

Hello!

Some reflections from last week's session:

What is unselfconsciousness in relationship to text? Can we work with the intention of that?

How do constraints support?

Does pedestrian movement support deeper discovery in text work?

Also, we note some have a preference for proscenium, others for village view, as far as feeling supported in open space.

Let's meet a little before 6p at guard desk again.

Teana will not be with us for the next three sessions, but Ben will!

Our schedule:

traditional format with open space

and two aunts: one based on solos from me and one an evolution of the "commenting aunt" from Jeremy (Taavo?) last week.

Dharma Art Letter the next week for reals!

Also, us in the core group should probably set an new date for the next evolution meeting...

xoxo

THIS VERY MOMENT: Portland Workshop

2010-08-11T17:57:00.000-07:00

THIS VERY MOMENT:
Disciplines for Improvisation and Composition
"This very moment is always the occasion."

Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche

Saturday August 28, 1-4pm
FINDING FOUNDATION: Using the Four Postures of Mindfulness as a source for dance improvisation and TAMING THE DISCURSIVE BODY with Stillness, Slow Motion and Repetition to make solos on-the-spot.

Sunday August 29, 1-4pm
THE RED SQUARE: Investigating composition practices beginning with seeing yourself in the space and engaging with props as 'allies'.

With New York based teaching artist Damaris Webb
Damaris is a performer, director and teaching artist whose work explores
the intersection of
contemplative dance, improvisational performance art,
and contemporary theater.
She holds an MFA
: Contemporary Performance
from Naropa University,
and a BFA from The Experimental Theater Wing of NYU.
With an extensive background in Viewpoints Practice, Moment Work,
Composition & P
erformance Making
and Psychophysical Acting,
she merges her love for deep play, artistic discernment and search for personal sustainability.

$50 for both sessions.

Bodies in Balance

208 Southwest 1st Avenue #340

Portland, OR 97204

A $25 non refundable deposit is required to reserve your spot.

Please contact damaris.webb@gmail.com with

“This Very Moment”

in the subject heading to make a reservation

or for further questions

Limited to 10 participants

Visitors comments - Fall 08

2008-10-11T14:07:00.000-07:00

Please leave any comments here if you've visited our Monday night events. Just click on the icon below. Many thanks!

Images and comments from 'Mythologies of a Species'

2008-04-29T10:01:00.000-07:00

You can comment and/or describe images from the 2 performances April 25-26 by clicking on the icon below. And thank you!

The thought about the future occurs in the present

2008-04-07T14:02:00.000-07:00

Can we continue to support evolution? Support through commitment to participating, though experiments, though discussion and examination and though each one's inner practice of waking up. How do we support evolution when every day is complete? And we must plan for the future?

What is a definition of improvisation? We make something in time and in space with what we already know. We use the tools we have. We let the environment be heard. Together with our tools and the environment something occurs....not planned, but true. Is this the mythogies of our species? What stories do we find in space?

We rehearse improvisation. Is that a crazy twist or sane training? Who is the director? I felt stuck at the Faculty OUt Front concert last Thursday. How do I direct in such a classic setting? It felt so awkward. I wanted to be in a different place, not stuck on the edge of the stage. Where is the place for the director's chair in a classical performing arena?

Does each person view the desolatedelight AUNT through their personal lens? Are the myths private to each one who watches? Is there a shared story somewhere?

What do we want to give?

Naropa Community Practice Day show - March 4

2008-03-04T11:14:00.000-08:00

Below you can click the comment icon and leave any thoughts, images for the Project.
Thank you.

Post Your comments from last Monday 2/25 here

2008-02-29T21:33:00.000-08:00

Expanding out - How can this be an offering?

“Whatever it is, passionate and complete involvement engages the heart and body in one activity. We are contained, not dribbling away our energy or entertaining ourselves in half- hearted frivolity. Practicing these art forms springs from a longing to see things as they are, longing to connect ourselves to the order and harmony of the natural world, and longing to communicate this harmony to others…your perceptions are sensitized and this intensifies the presence of the world. You see more vividly and deeply and from that clarity you can execute your work of art. You empty yourself of the small mind and perform the action so completely that you loose self-consciousness. There is a precise awareness undisturbed by inner chatter. Then you can tap into the larger, mote creative mind in which you do not feel separate from your materials and your art. Everything clicks and your action feels unified and effortless. When you persevere in practicing the forms, then you can actually connect with them so thoroughly that sometimes you feel as if you did nothing – the form of your work just come through you.”
- Sacred World Jeremy & Karen Hayward

Dark with Light Menu Laurie takes the director’s chair
Barbara is using a timer with a meditation or mindfulness alarm (although it’s not here this week!), so that the Aunt can be timed without someone watching the clock. Working with an evolving solo quad form, lights, stones, musing stool, votives.

Laurie will be using the mindfulness bell as a signal to pause.

Reflections on the first 15 minutes of this Aunt:
The lights go out. Barbara enters along the wall to US wall and places three votives on a plate against the US wall. She returns to downstage and takes three more votives on another paper plate and pads to the evolving line of candles upstage. Eliza puts on music from Barbara’s CD collection as five crawl from the cushions to onstage together. Barbara is returning after the third trip with the lit votives, there is now a line of candles against the back wall. She returns to the cushions. The five in all black begin squat-walking, torsos erect, legs in a crouch, both hands on the ground. They stop and agree to move together, then in dust and trios. Variations of the squat walk become manifest. Christa enters upright walking. Tyler turns on the mag-light highlighting certain activities in the space. Everything is moving quickly. Laurie rings the pause bell, the group pauses for maybe five seconds. Eliza asks, “Does the bell mean something? “Pause!” is the group response.

Beautiful spatial and timing agreements are being made, beautiful simultaneous trios, duet and solos that flows in and out of flocking (is this due to the influence of the music?) “Does the bell mean something? “Pause!” Beautiful moments of stillness and again new duets and trios. Barbara turns off the cd. The sound of smooth rocks is heard and a duet’s footsteps falling as the run out of the space and rejoin the cushions. A trio now remains. They are suspended, balanced and backlit by the votives. Tyler’s flashlight now illuminates only Erika’s feet.

The whistles and sound of screeching train brakes from across the road accompanies the sound of the rocks in Eliza’s hands. Katherine remains looking out the back window for the train.

Barbara has entered from the other wall with a clip light and supports the images that Tyler chooses to light. A large shadow of Christa’s hands with the rocks plays on the upstage wall. She abruptly lets the rocks drop to the floor. “Shit”. I feel a little lost right now. Laurie rings the pause bell.
The clip light and flashlight go out.

A horizontal beam of light from the mag cuts through the space. Barbara and Eliza both proceed up opposite walls and plug in clip lamps.

Katherine begins speaking about her experience of remembering that she left a muffin wrapper in her parked car at the long-term parking lot. Others from the cushion begin echoing bits of her text. Eliza asks “what kind of a wrapper?”. The text begins building with side conversations echoing and interweaving with Katherine’s monologue. Katherine exits as Barbara makes her way across the space to Eliza.

Laurie rings the pause bell.

Tyler, Christa and Miriam enter echoing the squat walk from the beginning of the improv. The commitment to the physicality results in some of the most hilarious physical humor I’ve seen in a long time.

Katherine’s monologue returns now standing on the stool upstage with a metronome.

Notes from a Monday Evening Practice

2008-02-24T11:31:00.000-08:00

Below is Damaris Webb's notes, which she has been taking for every Monday Evening Practice since Sept 07.

Monday 2/18 D/D notes – Damaris
Eliza absent
One MFA outside gaze
Evolution of Group Mind

Evening Format:
6:30 – 7:30 Sitting and Personal awareness practice
7:30 – 7:40 Break/the Gaze
7:40 – 9:30 two sets of Light and Dark - 45 minutes each with a 15-minute silent break
9:30 - 10:00 Housekeeping/Discussion

Dark with Light Menu - Tyler takes the director’s chair
Barbara is using a timer with a meditation or mindfulness alarm, so that the Aunt can be timed without someone watching the clock. Working with an evolving solo quad form, lights, stones, musing stool, votives

Before we start Cara asks if an aesthetic is developing with the lights or a trend. To her it feels perhaps like a shift towards theatrical from dance.

As a culture we then begin to list the moments that seem to be recalled from our mythology:
Zen walks, votives in arches on the wall, prostration and crawling groups, lying Buddah, the corded people against the wall, two people sharing a stool and musing, looking out the darkened window to the parking lot, laughing geese on the back, the musing stool, solo quads, flocking, herding, swarming. We also call upon reinforcement of repetition and stillness.

Tyler requests that the room to settle in the dark before we begin, then someone define the space with the votives. Tyler suggests that if we encounter a time when we don’t know what to do next, return to the menu of stillness, repetition, Let it come down so something else can come up.

REFLECTIONS on the first three minutes of this Aunt:

As I sit and wait and listen in the dark with the rest of the ensemble on the cushions, I flash a very clear call into the darkness, a very clear image of how the votives wish to be in space. I wait for three beats and then I enter the space and set up votives demarking the four quads. There is a moment as I walk back into the area of the cushions where I look back to see how my image looks to me from here, to discriminate if it is set up correctly.

The first entrance is the flashlight! The large, unfocused light sweeps along the back wall and ceiling, as the focus of the center is slowly turned into view.

Barbara enters from downstage slowly leaning/dragging along the wall with a clip lamp and long extension cord. Very purposefully, almost rhythmically, she uncoils the roll of extension cord, casting it before her as if she’s casting out a line, into the darkness before her.

In a few moments I join into the Aunt on stage, memories of this experience include the unspoken agreement in the moment of one group freezing when the light went on and another group beginning movement. It feels as if the culture has developed a group awareness for timing and space! I also have a strong impression of an improved dialogue, reflecting in the moment on the moment of acting or not acting on impulse, whisper spoke with Katherine as we looked out the back window.

Dark with Light Menu 2 - Miriam takes the director’s chair
Some images in particular:
The tick/tock of the slow metronome influencing a tick/tock vocabulary of movement, first with Tyler and Erika, then joined by Bobby.

In general many cool problem solving techniques. I kept watning to see images at the outside of the door, but was afraid if I went out of the room , by the time I got to the outside door, the image in the room would have changed.

Miriam from the director’s chair asks Tyler to tell us about his brother. Also my improved text spoken by me with Christa Ray as echo or underscore or chorus (somewhat ala Gertrude Stein) about my perceptions about what can be seen at the reservoir.

post AUNT discussion
Our group mind is evolving! Both Tyler and Miriam from the perspective of the director’s chair note they would imagine something in the space and before they could call it, it would be done. We note that having someone sit in the director’s chair, whether they say one thing or not, helps to hold the space so that the energy doesn’t leak out.

Housekeeping
Community Practice Day showing is Tuesday 3/4 from 3:45 to 4:30 at Nalanda. We will meet at 2pm for an abbreviated sit and w-up.

Dark and with Light (and Sound)

2008-02-21T08:22:00.000-08:00

Light & Dark Menu
Barbara is using a timer with a meditation or mindfulness alarm, so that the Aunt can be timed without someone watching the clock. Working with an evolving solo quad form, lights, stones, musing stool, votives. Eric Lacossa’s Dessert Soundscape

It’s a very different experience writing in the dark. Frankly I’m not so sure about how to document this process now. I feel my gaze is very subjective, what I’ll record are not facts or quotes. Do I trust that the group mind has developed enough that what I perceive is what is necessary to record? For what reason do I record this? Are we so in the now that my observations are superfluous? Are the moments and images that arrest/stimulate/relax me moments that point to something deeper, actually pointing to synchronicities or set ups that occurred seconds or hours or days earlier? How do I record that process?

I’m so exhausted I’m not sure I can trust what I’m thinking or feeling. We start in the darkness. I am sitting on a cushion, like the rest of the ensemble. Barbara is in the director’s chair. Barbara enters with the smooth little rocks in the straw basket, kneeling. Bobby sets the candles up in a repeat of the cross formation from last week, delineating the four quads of our playing space. After a little Laurie whispers to me to pass her the flashlight. Tyler comes to the CD player and turns it off. How bold! Cara enters from the audience as Laurie begins slowly rolling the large mag flashlight in a semi circle on the floor. Erika, Eliza and Katherine join Cara in the slow crawl from their seats on the cushions in the audience. I am aware that the green tea is especially hot and delicious and restorative. The four crawlers have reached the back of the space and two of them begin crawling up the wall. Synchronicity is strong in group agreement to hold images.
Laurie investigates walking along the wall with the flashlight the arching the flashlight again in half circles on the floor. Each sound is part of the choreography. The darkness of the room intensifies our awareness of sound. Although I cannot see her do it from the angle I am resting at I hear Cara roll the small rocks onto the floor. A satisfying sound. A recognizable sound. How many sounds do I know in the this studio? What is a surprise in the dark? What sounds are a part of our culture? I feel calm and bathed sitting in the dark, I notice the red light glowing from the silent boom box and I feel relieved that my back hurts a little less with the rolled up cushion in the small of my back.

Barbara goes back to sit in the director’s chair, Erika crawls to downstage and off into the cushions. Meanwhile the cross formation of the votives is being dismantled.

What are the rules again?

Barbara asks that we “Continue to emphasize repetition”. Repetition from my personal vocabulary? Influence from another in the moment? Recycled images and moments from an earlier Aunt? On another night?

We have no outside gaze in our audience tonight. We are the only witnesses, the only interpreters of our offering tonight. It is so dark in the studio that I can hear a rock making a long rolling journey but I can’t see where it is, but know it’s trajectory none the less.

Barbara calls “Pause. For as long as you want.” Me? Should I pause in my gaze? Return my attention to my breath? Am I at this moment the gaze or the performer or the recorder or all simultaneously. How the audience perceives what you are doing affects what you are doing. Christa clears her throat. I can’t see that it’s Christa, but rather I recognize her sound, even though she does not speak. Booby hums from the audience. Laurie sweeps the flashlight and for a moment it illuminates this page I am writing. I see the black ink against the white paper and the shadow made from my pen.

Barbara asks “Christa, tell us a dream”.
Christa tells us about her dream about the Maharishi who had just died.
Barbara asks Christa to stay where she is as she is telling the story and asks Eliza to plug a clip lamp into the long extension cord.
It goes dark again and I become aware of Miriam dancing by a group of votive candles.

Emerging

2008-02-02T14:57:00.000-08:00

While I have been such an advocate for giving feedback through appreciation of specific events/moments we see at the end of an AUNT that delight us, I'm now wondering if even this way of building our 'myths' will deter the emerging properties of the next creative forms.

For instance, if I say I like the solo Bobby did with the 'flock/herd' moving in influence around the edges of the space (this was last Monday), and I don't mention another event, will this give the message that this other 'event' was not appreciated and therefore should die out?

We natually delight in the familiar, those performance images that we recognize and have enjoyed. But the emerging properties coming though spontaneous responses are not going to be familiar to us. How do we cultivate the delight in the more familier mythologies of our species and also support the unfamiliar, newly arising, soon-to-be-dominate experiences?

Can we still give feedback and know that if your actions were not mentioned they are still essential to the culture as a whole? It feels that the issue here is vitality, aliveness, responsiveness and a certain trust in being spontaneous without having a lot of second thoughts.

Perhaps the image of a certain event, say an AUNT, which is directed, polished, repeated, and coached,...over and over....happening in the space....at the same time as other present moment AUNTS are arising from the nowness of the space.... perhaps this kind of overlay will allow for a multiple field of aesthetics to emerge.

What marks a culture?

2007-12-26T10:25:00.000-08:00

Musing today I wondered about the identity of cultures. Some cultures are healing, caring; some are full of commerce, and buy and sell all the time; some cultures make war; some cultures make beauty, and poetry and song.

What identifies desolate/delight culture? Maybe sometimes we do all of these energetic activities, then there is a transformation and we energize differently? What makes some form trans form? Why do we change and when? Why do we resist changing? Are we afraid? What do we need to learn to change without resistance?

The answers are in my experience....how to know my experience without avoiding what is unfamiliar?

What is subconscious gossip about change? What is my neurosis when something new is rising up to the consciousness?

What are the forms in a culture that support beauty? Or perhaps what allows beauty to emerge in conflict? What songs do we sing to heal? What do we sell that creates peace? Merging in and out of states of knowing.

When do I feel relaxed and whole? What is my kinesthetic delight?

When does impulse obscure knowing, avoid being? When do I repress impulse? When do I follow?

How long does it take to evolve? Now the questions are circling around the disciplines of the warrior-artist-in-training. This image from the Shambhala teachings....the Y-WAIT notion. The artist in a culture explores these questions. The artist never averts her eyes. The artist keeps the gaze, the watchers, the audience in her awareness, making a clear offering of her passion, aggression, her ignorance without self-consciousness. The artist makes beauty and surrenders it to any buyer, offers it to any struggle, sings it to any dying person, animal, plant, body of water, mountain....sings to the sun.

Comments from December Third Studioshowing

2007-12-03T15:12:00.000-08:00

Here's the place to make any comments about our studioshowing on December Third. Particularly what images stood out, what was unusual, what was confusing....and then any other observations, comments, questions. Thanks for visiting!

2007-11-20T18:27:00.000-08:00

I have an observation that actually arose from last semester's (spring) work with Aunts. It has occurred to me to divide the performance work we have been creating into two groups--work that fits into the category of "images" and work that fits into the category of "scenes".

The way I define an "image" is this: movement, tableau, sound, etc that has the quality of presenting unchanging information.

I define a "scene" as: movement, tableau, sound, etc that has the quality of presenting a series of substantially different pieces of information, moods or actions.

These are tentative definitions and are open to revision. In our work I've noticed both of these categories and it has been interesting to watch how I respond as an audience member. In both cases the aspect of "time" seems to be unrelated... an "image" can last for ten minutes and a "scene" can take place in thirty seconds.

An example of what I mean by an image-Aunt: BD's Laughing Butcher Bird. This Aunt had three main elements of shuffling feet, laughing on the floor and the jungle soundscape. At the time of the performers falling to ground the first time, the audience had basically received the "information" of the Aunt, and what came after was a repetition of the same event [which was, of course, delightful!].

An example of a scene-Aunt: EL's Grooming Two. In this Aunt I observe three significantly distinct phases--the partner grooming, the couple interacting with the groomers and finally the groomers dragging their partners toward the upstage corner.

Please observe that these categories are not absolute. Even within an "image", change occurs and within a "scene" we find moments of images. Maybe we can look at these definitions as ends of a continuum with a lot of room for overlapping.

My sense is that these definitions may be useful in our process of setting and structuring material--setting lengths of time, deciding which Aunts go next to other Aunts and being clear on the information we are offering to our audiences.

Please feel free to respond with your own opinions and insights as my ideas are just budding and would appreciate the company of more well-informed flowers, like yourselves.

aspects of Change

2007-11-18T18:38:00.000-08:00

I found this pie chart on google images when I typed the word change. I like to do that, type one word in and see what comes up. Tonight, after I got home from our brunch, our gathering to reflect on and talk about what is happening in our culture, I got afraid. Full of fear...which Is a red flag for me, so I thought about why I am feeling fearful, I think it is about moving forward change, the inevitablity of change, and what that means, as we evolve as a culture...how do we keep the preciousness our what we have started with...it reminds of me of the feelings of sadness for material that has been left behind...how real that is, how true it is that we are forging ahead...so I saw this chart...and the title of it is "aspects of change" there is people, which I think would be each of us individually, then there is the culture which is our group and the processes of this journey we are on as a group and as a whole.
There may be fear, but I am a Y.W.A.I.T--Young Warrior Artist In Training...and if I can just keep going forward and being present and telling the truth of where I am, I believe that it will be ok. The progression of our culture, the huge leaps it feels like we take, the integrity can still live in that, with a lil bit of trust and fearlessness. That being said I exhale a sigh of relief and gratitude for the time we are spending together. I am very grateful to be a part of this culture.

thank you all for the lovely nourishing
Laurie

already taste......talk and I....right tongued

2007-11-17T16:47:00.000-08:00

What will the bread pudding taste like tomorrow?
Will I make it to the bread pudding and quiche?
Will it go like I think it will go.?
(me in the car, following the lefts and rights..clip,,clip..entering the place.pressing the code..tada! being there. Like I am here pressing the keys and like I was there , kissing my hand , laying on the stump...)

And you all
(will you be there wearing colors?..bringing quiche and vegtables...?will we talk all together with excitement and will we talk into the deeps? will the bounderies soften like they sometimes do?)

.........Something .
I am responding to the discussion about words in the space--I inhabit space--talk and sing and fly and feel into the space in a brave way .I fight a little struggle..(.grrr..ruff! ) and a few tears...(living is so sad.and CONTRADICTORY!)..then I can rest and be and listen and RELATE THEN I CAN MOVE IN AN HONEST WAY. It is luxurious to go through this clumbsy HUMAN PROCESS.(.messy ...discursive) and including and inviting it AS the art. I think this happens when I sit to meditate too. AND half the time I want SO much space and silence.......so I can FEEL the illiopsoas or right part of my TONGUE...And (now I remember that dumb beings can uncover enlightenment the same as smart ones and silly people and mean ones too). OH there is RoOm for All Of uS. Because all of us IS.

(this is what I am thinking -- with - out a lot of formalism. It's Saturday night after all)

What about december third. could we offer cider?
we could pour it DIRECTLY INTO THeiR HANDS! (thumbs and all!)
that would save some trees.
ha!
LOvE,

Delight

2007-11-15T16:42:00.000-08:00

Last Monday we took such delight in creating AUNTS....one after another, they emerged from space; the space in our minds and the space in the room. These carry-overs of images delight me. The return of Cara talking about 'wholesome' and being asked by Damaris to put on the green bonnet and old fashioned dress (I know that was from before), the request of the monologue about 'garbage and compost and recycling', and of course, our signature mythology, geese on their backs. This is the organism weaving and creating patterns.

Since our culture is being created to make performances, and we have the 'gaze' in the room now regularly, yet the infamous December Third Evening with maybe 30 people including the Director of the MFA Program in the room is different. What is the difference? Does the arrival of a more traditional audience stimulate our culture to a new level of presentation?

Can we cobble together both new AUNTS and returning AUNTS and still keep our minds-hearts open to something that has yet to appear?

Can we begin to call in other elements like lighting? Someone wanted to change the lights this past Monday....it's the first time that impulse arose. We have some props....the basket of stones, the 3-legged stool, and some costumes, the green bonnet and old fashioned dress. We have the boom box and some sound environments.

Our 'deSoLAtE/deLiGHt' project is getting defining features!

“Commenting"

2007-11-08T07:59:00.000-08:00

I have been very interested in the reoccurring question in improv of how we as performers deal with text in space. Is text truly an element that can possibly be part of a natural hierarchy (where elements arise to the forefront as they are needed, and do not dictate the focus)? more on natural hierarchy For example, during our solo quad work there will be four people up, doing solos, specifically choosing not to take influence from each other, and it seems that we can keep those solos discrete even with a soundscape playing. However, as soon as spoken text is introduced, it permeates the space, and it is quite challenging not to be influenced by it. Yet there are times when text seems to support the space, the improv, the unity of the whole, and other times that it seems to be distracting or uncentered. I believe somehow this has to do with “commenting”. Just as movement choices can be commenting on a situation, and not actually in it, or as Miriam suggested, can be a “cop-out” of the form, I believe that sometimes text can be used that way too.

Intrigued by our discussions of recycling of materials and sustainability in our art making, I came across the following sentence from a Zero Waste Site, “Instead of managing wastes, we will manage resources and strive to eliminate waste”.

Perhaps sometimes with our use of text there is a feeling of “wastefulness” that comes about? How can we be as conscious (without being self conscious) about our text? In the same way we think about speed, duration, influence, imitation, or color, texture and variation on a theme with movement?

We have a website!

2007-11-07T16:38:00.000-08:00

The idea is that archival information and research documents related to the project will be hosted at www.desolatedelight.bravehost.com!

'Talking' together about this World

2007-11-01T15:52:00.000-07:00

So much has happened. Our first wonderful supper together around the fire, and our conversation/salon about 'sustainability'. The field of our knowing is wider for all this! I crave these deeper conversations together.

And then this Monday Evening we began another conversation.....Damaris created an AUNT from Cara's talk the week before. This is a kind of development of the 'system'. Our world talks together. We listen to one another and answer through the process of creating AUNTS. We build upon what we experience. We use everything that we experience in the Monday Evenings as inspiration. We re-use. We recycle.

We don't throw anything away. And also we let go of what needs to be let go. Is this a contradiction? Suzuki Roshi in 'Zen Mind, Beginner's MInd' talks about pulling mind weeds and then burying them next to the best of plants. Letting the garbage transform into black gold. We let go of what blocks the flow....and we use these blocks as images, events, AUNTS, musings, rants......

How do we start shaping AUNTS in the foreground with an AUNT in the background? I want to have a long AUNT, slow and in another time with many events beginning and ending around it, in front of it, behind it.

We have some recurring props (the stones in a basket, the 'musing ' chair) and costumes (the bonnet and the dress). Where to they reside? Are they always present in the space?

And what about our basket of AUNTs already offered?

evolution

2007-10-25T07:57:00.000-07:00

Hi. this is my first blog too . .

I am thinking about this question of how / when / why do we evolve?
Did we evolve in the old days for survival reasons? or just by simple chance? over what span of time? generations?
Maybe if I developed a too long thigh bone, this is what enabled me to run far, catch fast food . .?
I've heard that we evolved sweat glands, and that actually made room for our voice box which enabled us to develop sound and language . . . was there a reason for this? what was / is driving this reason?
I guess my question is, in this consciousness that we potentially have, what is our purpose?
to catch better food? to survive the blistering heat? to be able to find water?
Is there an underlying survival agenda driving us?
Drive? desire? agenda? imperative? what could lead us where?
If not survival, then . .
Bliss? Disolution? No differentiation? Complete integration of individual and whole?
utter - fill - ment?
How do we choose? decide? what shall we do then?
ah, the great matter.
to be aware, and yet, to follow

and also, I note that when we are playing up there on stage, there are about a hundred evolutions every minute -- if we slow down enough to notice them . . we are creating language all the time - with a gesture of the chin raising up or a snicker to the side . . when do we just speed pass all these tiny accidents of creation . . when do we follow them and let them be the seeds of our language? our evolution? with no pre-determined goal? or the goal of creating a culture?

evolve: to unroll, derive, educe, develop, work out, to produce by natural evolutionary processes, emit
evolution: a process of change in a certain direction: unfolding, the action or instance of forming or giving something off: emission, a process of continuous change from a lower, simpler, or worse to a higher , more complex, or better state: growth, a process in which the whole universe is a progression of interrelated phenomena . . .

Culture/community/ensemble--desolate

2007-10-24T18:23:00.000-07:00

I am bumping up against this idea of Culture, of a community, of an ensemble. All three different things yes maybe so and I feel a strong yearning for them, yet wonder the capability or possibility for any to be, truly. Am I holding on to tight to a certain idea of what these three "things" mean to me, also another maybe. I know one thing about it, is that I need a culture, a community, an ensemble to allow me to sustain myself. So I am not doing this all alone. So I dont feel quite so desolate as an artist. This is why I am here in D/D. I need this culture. This community, this ensemble of amazing people to help sustain in this world.

thats all, i think for know
Laurie

What comes first?

2007-10-24T15:02:00.000-07:00

I often wonder when we discuss parts of Trungpa Rinpoche's teachings (which are part of the inspiration of d/d), whether there is a developmental order or not. Can we talk about
'thorough relaxation and wholesomeness'
without talking about
'absence of of neurotic mind'
and then before that is creating
'space'. As Rinpoche says
'Before we produce anything at all....' we need space....space which accommodates all...
lots of room, freedom, and wakefulness'.

So when we sit together, then we are making room for each of us to create that kind of inner space. MInd space. Open, present. That leads to sensing the presence of my 'neurotic mind', those deeper uncertainties and anxieties, and touching it and letting it go. Then as I am moving in personal movement practice I cultivate a kinesthesia that is 'thoroughly relaxed and wholesome' but then, I have to not get 'lazy' which is the next one....
'absence of laziness'.

Neurosis makes me feel energized. It's familiar. There is some frontier of experience when I cultivate relaxation....I start to drift. I only know relaxation as the start of flop. So then I have to wake up in the embodied relaxed state....awake, present, just here. What would we create if we could all do this?

gratitude for monday night

2007-10-18T10:05:00.001-07:00

i finally logged in to the blog...my first blog experience! i so appreciate the openness of the ensemble on monday night as i presented my 'experiment' with breath/movement/energy and flocking. it is such a gift to be a part of an artistic community that welcomes new ideas and offers a safe space to try things, make mistakes, and just explore possibilities. i learned a lot!
i watch the huge ancient Cottonwood tree dance in the sunlight--wind(breath) initates movement, creates an energy of DeLIGHT which reaches me behind the window.
luv, christa

The original announcement of the project for the Naropa MFA Theater Program

2007-10-12T09:27:00.000-07:00

Here's a link to the original announcement for the desolate delight project!

After Monday

2007-10-09T07:39:00.000-07:00

Two thoughts this morning....first, after all my desire to create an open field of conversation in the 'culture' I'm the one who forgot to tell everyone about the video camera! I am very sorry....no red flag went up when Joan mentioned she was bringing it...it just went right by me and didn't register. Hopefully we can navigate through the bump! And second, we didn't talk about the Desert Quadrants. Except at the end when we moved to the new form including swarming/herding/flocking as part of our opening practice. So help me to remember to include time for those discussions. They are so juicy! Oh, and also I forgot to dedicate our creative energy to the larger field. That's important. Maybe that could become a 'little job'?

i c u

2007-10-08T16:31:00.000-07:00

soundscape-birds tell each other about themselves
I see-one red scooter in space motionless, the reflection of the house across the street, a rock about the size of a head perched on the patio.
end

my eyes and more and more my ears are opening to seeing so many AUNTS around. moments in time I stop and notice the beauty of...I notice the performance of...i notice. its about that

D/D is about Noticing for me...its about noticing

l

will the title be yellow ? how can I make it a color?

2007-10-08T13:34:00.000-07:00

Hello dds,
I got in.
opened the door and here I am .
read the other postings about
Trungpa Rinpoche and Zen and the sandwhich.
It's me, Katharine.
I read a couple poems in front of people as a part of a new book, "Uncontained...in the margins....garden" with the eco-arts gang on saturday and listened to many while looking up at the great big sycamore at Naropa's Lincoln campus. The poets seem relaxed and wholesome and the day was like that..watching the sun shine up the leaves and get in the eyes of all the poets..They squint but the sun is still in the eyes. I wanted to move around but I stood pretty still and read like the others (a thumb away from the mic) and it was soo fun and inspiring...I love the poets and inspired MYseLF!

Last week dd was hard for me to get out of my previous week of deep silence and sitting and rise to the occasion of the creative buzz of the work...There must be some seperation in my being that takes a while to climb back into the brave world of speech and creative juice...So, listening to the poets and reading myself I started to get the feel back again...Oh this is a voice...this is what we do..talk into the mic or in the street or at the bank or down by the river....By the way there is a wall where people are putting up things they write...at the library..part of the eco-arts wall.

Ok. Now you can all see how I'm getting the swing of the CoLOrs....and the liGht has changed in these few moments it took me to write. It is shining up the keys.
Do we write love?
sure.
alright then.
(I'm looking forward to us in three and a half hours from now.)

love,( love...as oppossed to...brown or black...)
kk

Delight

2007-10-08T07:11:00.000-07:00

Here's the quote from Trumgpa Rinpoche about 'delight'....will also post the one about desolation. This sparked the tille of the project. I'm also so moved by the image of 'artists and unemployed samari' which is the chapter title.

WORK OF ART

What a work of art is all about is a sense of delight. Touch here, touch there, delight. It is an appreciation of things as they are and of what one is -- which produces an enormous spark. Something happens -- clicks -- and the poet writes poems, the painter paints pictures, the musician composes music.

From "Artists and Unemployed Samurai" in THE TEACUP AND THE SKULLCUP: CHOGYAM TRUNGPA ON ZEN AND TANTRA. Page 42.

AUNTs in the Kitchen!

2007-10-07T18:56:00.000-07:00

I have been checking out the blogging situation for the past couple days yet I have been scared maybe to type my thoughts...Im not sure. So Anyway...It is sunday and I just made dinner...I fixed grilled cheese and tomato soup. I was really excited to eat the grilled cheese but I burnt it. Then once my meal was finished being cooked...I decided well I can just dip my grilled cheese in the soup to drown out the cajun style sandwich. I would say that this was an AUNT....and then it became an AUNT directed when I decide to dip the grilled cheese in my soup, which I totally didnt have on the "menu" before hand! hahaha!!

and now I am gonna eat it to contribute to my sustainability! YES!

much love to all you desolate delighters...its truly an honor and pleasure to be around you.
Laurie aka damaris' roommate

Sign Post

2007-10-04T14:48:00.000-07:00

I was just doing the dishes and thinking about how quick and efficient my meals have become... when it occurred to me that AUNTS is fast-food, or I should say, AUNTS is a very contemporary form in that it offers instant gratification, unlike long, belabored choreography rehearsals... and so how perfect that we are combining it with the slow-food feel a of a year-long commitment... and then I wanted to try out the new blog... and then I got soapsuds on the keyboard.
Love,
Miriam

Thank you Miriam!

2007-10-02T10:46:00.000-07:00

Here we go....into the 21st century. Creating the spontaneous compostions....AUNTS...last night was a big step forward. The landscape is getting very large. Let's just stay awake as our 'system' unfolds with this new energy imput!

As for sustainability....keep letting go of subconscious gossip and find that kinesthetic sensation of relaxed and wholesome. and the phrase from CTR is 'space is solid stories'.....sometimes I say 'space is full of stories'.

Warmness and outbreaths!
Barbara